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So my hubby and I just finished watching Beauty and the Geek Season 4. This is one of my guilty pleasure shows and it’s about a bunch of socially inept geeks and a crowd of gorgeous people working together to change themselves. The winners are supposed to be the couple that went through the largest transformation. This season one of my husband’s college classmates was on it. At first he would laugh at me when I watch the show and then he saw the lone female geek Nicole Morgan and said, “wait a minute, she looks like my friend Niky”. Then I looked up her bio and indeed she really is my hubby’s former classmate. It was quite amusing when he pulled out his Caltech yearbook and found Nicole’s picture and then commented, “they made her geekier looking for the show.” Since then he has rooted for Nicole to win, but unfortunate the final winner was determined by a vote and I think Nicole’s partner Sam was not very popular with the voting audiences so they lost as a team. The prize is $250,000 split between a couple, and as the host announced the prize he said, “a couple’s life is about to change!” My hubby and I both said along the lines of, “that’s not enough money to change their lives!” So after the show I thought about how much money people would need to change their lives. I thought about the events that defined the state of my life, and perhaps I was wrong to say that half of $250,000 can’t change someone’s life. Here are some ways someone’s life could change and their associated costs.

online pharmacy usa viagra– $125,000 is enough for someone to go to college and get a degree that propels them into a good career. Or it could be used for a professional degree or vocational training that could be used to start a new life.

online pharmacy usa viagra — I think $125,000 can make a big dent in most people’s debt. I truly believe that being free of debt that continually drains you is a good thing that can change people’s lives.

online pharmacy usa viagra- Previously, I wrote about these days. Nevertheless I think it’s important to have a wedding without going into debt. Marriage is absolutely life changing.

online pharmacy usa viagra — One of my friend is pregnant right now and another one had a baby about 1.5 years ago. The process of raising a child could cost up to a million dollars, but every mommy I have met say that having a child changed their perspective on life.

online pharmacy usa viagra– I sincerely hope that donating a bit of money or items every month or year changes someone’s life out there. a flock of chicks for a family in need and feed malnourished children. It really doesn’t take much to change someone’s life by giving.

Everyone’s circumstance is different, but the important thing to remember is how we use our money. We don’t necessarily need millions to change our lives, but we need to be open to change and be willing to direct our resources towards improving our lives. I hope the winners of Beauty and the Geek will use their windfall wisely, and truly change themselves and the world.

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I come from a fairly small family. Each of my parents has one sister and each family has an only child. So basically I have a total of four uncles and aunts and two first cousins and only one aunt’s family is here in the Bay Area. The holidays usually involves a dinner or two with my aunt’s family and a few other family friends. Now that I am married I suddenly gained at least two dozen or so fairly immediate family members here in the Bay Area. It is kind of interesting and fun to me, but I hear from many people with huge families that the holiday season is the most stressful time of the year. I suppose it makes sense because the more people there are in a family there is more likely to be disagreements. Also, having a big family may be a financial burden if you are supposed to throw a feast and bring everyone gifts.

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Today I read some pretty bizarre news about former t. Basically the guy is on trial for rape because he performed vaginal exams on two foster daughters and the girls allowed it because he told them he is testing them for egg donation. He also told them that each egg could sell for $5000 or more. The tests this guy performed were for his own perverted pleasures, but the egg donation industry is quite real.

What I find funny is that when you sell genetic material you’re considered a “donor”, because to me donation means giving away money or services. When I was in college I saw ads in our school paper looking for intelligent and attractive women to sell their eggs. Eggs have to be harvested with a surgical procedure after the woman is injected with hormones and sells for anywhere from $5000 to $25000. I can see why having such an advertisement in the Berkeley campus paper makes a lot of sense. A lot of these collegiate women are not working and could really use the money to buy things and pay off debt, and being college students they are sort of prescreened for intelligence. Even so, a lot of these egg donation ads also ask for standardized testing scores from tests such as the GRE and SAT. A lot of these young women are also at the peak of their fertility. A news articles from last year reports that college towns are ripe for egg harvests and .

At first glance, it seems like selling a few cells for thousands of dollars isn’t such a bad deal. After all, it is impossible for a woman to use up all the eggs she is born with. “Donating” eggs does help a lot of infertile couples have children, and that is not a bad thing. People are encouraged to give blood all the time to save lives, and giving eggs creates life so it really seems like a win-win situation for all parties involved. However, I have quite a few concerns about selling eggs. The first is that since the egg dispensing industry is quite young it is not well regulated. There are predators like Ted Klaudt who trick young women into humiliating tests. Also, the health impacts of the hormones injected into these women isn’t very well studied. If a woman donates regularly she would be exposed to hormones that she would not produce naturally. That just seems a bit dangerous to me. Additionally, once the eggs are fertilized there is no telling what the fertility clinics are doing with them. There was a Law and Order episode where a fertility clinic sold one woman’s embryos to multiple couples without the original woman’s knowledge. Even though that is fiction I can see it happening. Basically you have no idea that your eggs are actually going to the one couple that is paying you. This causes problems because if you have children of your own and you have no idea that they have a bunch of half siblings out there it is kind of weird.

In I read a Rabbi said, “In Third World countries, [women] go into prostitution. Here, because they have good SAT scores, they sell eggs?” He is concerned that young women are setting prices on their genetic material based on their looks and college credentials. I think that’s not what concerns me the most because technically we do use our credentials and looks to some extent in other parts of life such as work and relationships. I definitely wouldn’t equate selling eggs with prostitution. What troubles me about selling eggs is that families with money can buy a designer baby and choose the genetic profile of their children pre-conception. One of my all time favorite movies is with Ethan Hawke and Uma Thurman, and in that world most humans’ genes are prescreened and parents receive a baby that is an “optimal” combination of themselves. I think buying eggs or sperm is just a type of gene selection. That really scares me because as gene therapy and selection become more and more prevalent and popular eventually the rich will be able to purchase intelligence and beauty before they are even born. Technology is changing how we reproduce drastically, and that created the egg-trade.  With all of that said, I don’t think I will ever sell my eggs even if I were in a financial bind.

Since selling eggs is so lucrative, if you were a young woman who hasn’t started in your career and really need money to pay off debts, would you ever sell your eggs? If you are a man who really needs money, would you ask your wife/girlfriend to sell her eggs?

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My schoolmate Anna asked the following in a comment:

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Well, first I have to say that everyone’s priorities are different, but my husband and I are saving for both. We are both contributing 17% of our income to our 401ks and we have gotten used to that deduction so we don’t miss the money at all. We don’t totally max out our 401k but 17% is a good amount that we’re both comfortable with. We’re keeping most of what we save outside of our 401ks in a and a Vanguard index fund and we do intend to use the money to purchase a home sometime in the future.

Personally I think that saving for a house shouldn’t be put ahead of saving for retirement. The reason is that money grows exponentially in a retirement fund with time. Generally the earlier you start contributing the larger a nest egg you would have in the end. Diverting your money from a retirement fund to purchase a home would require much larger retirement contributions in the future to achieve the same nest egg. Lets use some real numbers to see what I mean.

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Suppose that I put $1200 a month into a 401k. Since this money is contributed pre-tax, I am actually seeing a deduction of about $800 from my paycheck due to my fairly high tax rate in California. I can withdraw from my 401k at the age of 59.5 without penalty, so I can keep on contributing for at least 35 years. Assuming a fairly conservative average annual growth rate of 7% a year, my nest egg will grow to approximately $1,990,611 at age 59.5. Meanwhile I can still save whatever money I have left for a home.

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Suppose that I need a downpayment of $75,000 for a below median price Californian home and I am saving what I would have put into my 401k into a money market account. I would have to save after-tax money so I could only contribute about $800 per month and lets assume that I use a money market fund that pays 4% per year after tax. At this rate, it would take me just about seven years to save for the downpayment. The $75,000 is good for a 20% downpayment on a $375,000 home. Usually there are other closing costs so actually I need more money to buy a $375,000 home. Just to make this example simple, I will say that $75,000 is adequate for me to buy a $375,000 home and the entire $75k is applied to the price of the home. Suppose that I take a regular fixed 30 year loan on the remaining balance of $300,000 and I get a fairly good rate of 6% I would now have a mortgage payment of 1798.65 per month.

This scenario means that I would lose seven years on my retirement contributions. If I contribute $1200 a month to my retirement for only 28 years I would have only 1,599,377 at age 59.5.  To reach the same nest egg of scenario 1 at age 59.5, I would have to contribute about $2055 per month to my 401k for 28 years. This is not even possible without company matching because the IRS limit on 401k contributions is $15500 a year right now.

Now, some may argue that  savings are going into the home that I bought. Historically, home prices have only risen 2 to 4% over long periods of time. Additionally, there is a 1.1% property tax in California on the value of my home every year even if I have paid it off. In other states the property tax can be very high and completely wipe out the gains on a home. So, suppose that I take an extremely optimistic growth rate of 4% on my home then the home is worth about $1,216,274 after 30 years. However, I am not accounting for the effects of inflation and maintenance costs so I think I would break even at best.  If I put the mortgage money in an investment account instead I would have more than $2,000,000 after 30 years assuming a growth rate of 7%.  In that case, I could use my $2 million and buy a better house with cash.

With all of that said, I realize that not everyone live in a place with and in some places of the country it still makes sense to buy a home because the house payments are less than rents. In those less crazy parts of the country it doesn’t take seven years to save a reasonable downpayment so the potential time loss on a retirement account isn’t as severe. Saving for a home first could make sense for some people. However, it really would take young people years to save an adequate downpayment here in California. In fact, there is nothing decent for $375,000 here in San Mateo and a 20% downpayment on an average home is more likely to be $120000 to $140000. My stance on the subject is to save for retirement as much as you can and as soon as possible. You can still save for a home as much as you can, but you should clearly understand that a home is a cost center, and not a savings vehicle. I still want a house of my own, but I do not expect it to feed me and pay for my health insurance when I retire. I would approach buying a home as I would approach buying any other item, such as a car or a stick of gum. I want a quality home at a reasonable price, and I don’t mind waiting a while for a sale. While I wait to buy a home, I am building up a strong retirement nest egg. I hope I answered your question Anna!

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So I have been writing this blog for three months and I am surprised that I haven’t written about being an only child. I am an only child because I was born in China and my entire generation was subject to the . In China my entire class consisted of only children and the closest thing I had to a brother was my first cousin, who happens to be only 3 days older than me. Last year I read quite a few articles published by the official news agency of China about my generation of “little emperors” and “little princesses” and I found them quite interesting. Here is a short summary of the central government’s findings on this enormous social experiment.

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  1. A lot of only children are quite independent and very productive.
  2. Urban females are more educated than past generations since parents could only give attention and care to their only child. In past generations the boys usually received preferential treatment. The only-child policy actually did create more gender equality in urban areas.
  3. The only-child generation did not show distinct personality defects as feared by sociologists when the policy went into place. In fact, they are generally healthier than previous generation.
  4. Only children are more sociable than children with siblings because they have to get friends outside of their family.

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  1. The only-child generation tends to have less responsibility growing up and end up being lazier.
  2. Divorce seems to be rampant in this generation because of overprotective parents and unyielding egos.
  3. Only children have no idea how to take care of their own kid.
  4. As their parents and grandparents age these peers of mine will have to potentially take care of six people.

When I was a child I really thought that being an only child is the right and normal thing because it was the law and I was born into a world of only children. I remember that it took me a while to adjust to the fact that only children are fairly rare in America and most people has at least one sibling. Since in China the kids with brothers and sisters were from the countryside I thought that maybe most Americans are farmers. I had a few classmates that also came from China, but their parents chose to have more children in America. Most of these American siblings were ten or more years younger than my classmates. In fact, one of my friend’s mom produced his last little brother when he was a senior in high school. This is because in the Chinese culture children are considered blessings. In America the one child policy has many critics, and I agree that it does impede on the basic reproductive rights of human beings and millions of babies have died because of this law. However, population control is probably needed in the world and it’s a tough issue to resolve when most humans are biologically driven to have more children.

For the most part I did benefit from the law because I had the full attention of my parents and they provided me with all that I needed. Even though I live in America now I think I am not so different from my Chinese counterparts. However, my dad wrote in his blog (in Chinese) that I am much because I grew up in America. Looking back, I probably wouldn’t want a sibling to play and fight with and I quite enjoyed being an only child. There are definitely moments of loneliness, but I just filled my time by reading a lot of books and spending time with my parents. To this day I am still more comfortable talking with older people because I am used to having my parents as my friends. Maybe that’s why I identify with an old baglady and I am so keen on retirement planning. Now that I am married I am trying to adjust to not being an only child, but a wife. It is kind of hard since my hubby takes care of so many things around the house. He is the older brother in his family and he is definitely taking care of me in a lot of ways. I definitely need to take care of him more so that I maintain my marriage and not end up a divorce statistic.

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