Entries Tagged 'Marriage' ↓

So before I forget I should write about the trip to see the baby on Wednesday.  My husband made me wake up more than a hour early and we headed  to the hospital after we took showers.  We walked through the little farmer’s market in the parking lot and got to the ultrasound department in the basement and sat down to wait.  The hubby gave me a bottle of water to drink because the doctor recommended that I should have a full bladder.

There was a bit of commotion as some paramedics wheeled in an old man, and then the radiologist called me into an examination room.   The hubby got a chair behind the doctor and I had to lie down on a bed, and unfortunately my head was behind the monitor so I missed most of the action.     All I could do was to watch the hubby’s face and he had this cute look that was a mix of amazement and amusement.  Apparently our baby was moving all over the place and it was hard for the radiologist to do her work.  My OBGyn ordered a regular anatomy assessment so the radiologist had to take pictures of almost every part of the baby’s body at specific angles.  Since the baby moved so much it was hard for her to capture the specific photos.

While the radiologist clicked and moved the ultrasound probe she kept on mumbling random comments like, “this baby is an absolute meatball”.  She also said, “this is the jumpiest kid I have ever seen, what did you eat this morning????”  I only had a bottle of water.

She also said to my hubby, “I don’t want your wife to get jealous now, you are having all the fun watching this kid here.”  The hubby later told me that he felt quite a bit of glee at that.  He thinks it is unfair that I get to feel the baby move all the time now and he still has not felt it.

So after 45 minutes of this she said, “mom’s bladder is getting a bit too full” and she allowed me to go to the bathroom.  She took quite a few more pictures after that and then turned the monitor over to let me see the baby.  It was actually quite interesting since I could see every little bone in the baby’s hands and spine.  It was also pushing against the walls quite a bit.  The heart was also very clear with all of its chambers and jumped very quickly.  I only got to look at it for about a minute.

Finally when all the pictures were taken the hubby asked, “do you know what the gender is?”

The radiologist said, ” oh yeah!”  Then she put the probe to show  an image that was right between the baby’s legs.

I saw it immediately and said, “well, it looks like a boy”, and she said, “yup you are right!”  The hubby was a bit disappointed, but I was happy that my guess was right.

Then I said to him, “well, it is your Y chromosome that made this boy!”

He said, “yeah I know, I messed up.  This means we will have another one!”

We took home a few pictures the radiologist printed out for us.  Several of them were profile pictures and one was of the baby’s face.  I thought that he really looked like the hubby.  He has the hubby’s nose and the bottom lip is shaped like the hubby’s, too.  Some people have said that I am nuts and it is too early to tell, though.   Later on,  we showed the picture to our moms and they could not find where the face was and the hubby had to mark notes on Flickr.   The hubby also said that he counted the little fingers on the baby’s hand and it looked good.  The radiologist told us that everything looked fine, and it seems that the ultrasound machine gave fairly good estimates on the baby’s size in relation to his stage of development.

Yesterday we told my hubby’s grandpa that the radiologist called the baby a “meatball”, and he laughed and said that should be the baby’s name.  I asked him what “meatball” is in Tagalog, and he said, “bolabola”.  I think that is a cute nickname actually.  Every Filipino kid has a nickname and now  the hubby’s family seems to be stuck on the “meatball” idea.   The hubby says that would encourage our kid to be overweight, though.

Anyway, we might go to a baby picture place in a couple months and take some 3D ultrasound photos of the baby.   By then the face would be better formed and we will see more clearly who he looks like.

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Yesterday my friend had a lovely little baby girl. She is about a whole month early but she is okay! She looks a lot like her mom. Hopefully we will get to see her this weekend. Additionally, I received an advanced copy of the new Wise Bread book: 10,001 Ways to Live Large on a Small Budget . I really love how it is laid out. I only have a few articles in there because I don’t write many tips lists, but it is still pretty cool to see my name in it! If you are a financial blogger or press and would like to review the book you can probably request one here.

Besides these exciting developments, I am gaining a little weight due to my own pregnancy. My hubby keeps on telling me to prepare some maternity clothes, but I’m not quite big enough to need maternity clothes, yet. Today we went to Target and left the store with nothing, because most of the maternity section had capri pants that were way too big for me and the shirts were just like my normal shirts. Now my hubby says he’ll whine to my mom to buy clothes for me since I am horrible at shopping for clothes.

Since I’m in my 15th week now I have asked HR what forms I need to fill out for my maternity leave. I am planning to take leave two weeks before my due date mostly because all the moms I know that had their first babies in the last year had their babies 2 to 5 weeks before their due dates. I really don’t want to be at the office while I go into labor. The good news is that I found out that my employer has private short term disability insurance that I can use in conjunction with the state short term disability so I can get 100% of my pay during the pregnancy disability leave, which would be anywhere from 6 to 8 weeks depending on whether or not I have a C section.

As to child birth, I am hoping that I would not need a C-section, but sometimes it is unavoidable. In the case of my friend the doctors determined that her baby cannot tolerate a normal delivery due to various issues. I was in the room when they told her that she probably needs a C-section and one of the doctors was really quite scary. She said that if my friend attempted a normal delivery it is possible that the baby might go into distress and then they would need to perform an emergency C-section and “slash and cut and burn”. While the doctor said those words she was making motions of brandishing a scalpel. I was just speechless, and after she left the room my friend’s husband said, “What was that?? She was making some scary motions.” I really feel that sometimes doctors tells people the worst thing that could happen, but I guess it is better to be safe than sorry.

Anyway, this year is going by quite quickly. It still feels a bit surreal that we will be having a baby, and I don’t think it has hit us yet because everything is going along just as before. I am not getting sick at all and work is not overly stressful right now since we just finished a big release. The hubby and I are still spending a lot of time watching TV and playing games. I think I am playing more games now since I feel like once I am a mom I will have much less leisure time.  In terms of preparing for the baby so far I requested a free sample of diapers and a free sample of infant formula.  I think that is good enough.

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Well, my hubby has finally done it.  We are officially pregnant.  He actually banned me from telling anyone until he made sure he saw the little amorphous blob’s heartbeat yesterday.  After he got home from the hospital he was super excited and wrote a post himself.  He called it a nooblet, which is a term taken from this nerdy gamer show called  Pure Pwnage.

The doctor told us that the due date is 10/31, and my hubby said, “Nooo!  I don’t want a Halloween baby!”  However, very few women actually deliver on their calculated due dates, so he may not be getting a Halloween baby.  Personally, I think that would be kind of neat, because our kid could invite other kids over for costumed birthday parties.

My husband and I are already talking about what leave we could take when the baby arrives.  Personally I will have about a month of paid vacation saved up, and then we both can get 6 weeks of California Paid Family Leave.  The paid family leave is paid at 55% of our salary from the SDI program which we pay into.  There is no California income tax on that money and we could spread out the leave between the two of us so it would not be a very big financial strain.  I do not think I would qualify for the pregnancy disability leave because my job mostly consists of thinking and typing and I am allowed to work at home.  Unless I am ordered by the doctor to bedrest I would not be considered disabled. Anyway, we will both talk to our HR departments soon.  All things considered, November is actually a good month to have the baby because there are already many paid holidays in November and December during the holiday season, and it would be more relaxing to take time off then because most other people will be taking time off.  Also, we can claim the baby as a tax exemption for the entire year and save some money on taxes.

Another thing we have to consider is which health insurance plan to add our baby to.  My husband currently has a PPO plan and I have Kaiser HMO.    Right now both of us pay very little for our health insurance because our employers pretty much covered everything.  Kaiser is really convenient for us because the hospital is about a mile away and they have everything there.  It is likely that we will just add the child to my insurance, and this will cost about $100 more a month.

Anyway, before all of that happens, I have to actually get through this pregnancy.  So far my hubby is thankful that I am not puking my guts out.  I am actually feeling pretty good and I am eating more than usual.  I am also sleeping a lot, so I am blogging quite a bit less.  I guess after the baby is born I would also be a “mommy blogger”, but I promise I will not be chronicling every diaper rash.

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A lot happened in the last 24 hours that made me feel happy and fortunate, and I think I should write these events down.

First, I got two free meals yesterday since my company had a company meeting and a holiday party.  Spouses were invited to the holiday party so my hubby joined me at dinner time.  One of the special speakers at our company meeting was supposed to be Ronnie Lott, a former 49er and hall of famer, but he didn’t show up because his private equity firm was having troubles.  So instead he sent over seven autographed footballs to be raffled off at our party.  Every person got a ticket and when the winners were called the announcer threw the balls to them across the restaurant.  The second winner was an extremely excited engineer who held out his hands, but the ball landed straight on his forehead and he was knocked back a bit.  Then my husband won the next ball while he was saying he never wins things at raffles.  He stood up and the announcer threw the ball at him and he caught it!  He received some cheers and applause and he hammed it up a bit by raising his hands straight up with the ball.  Neither of us knew who Ronnie Lott is, but the hubby is hoping that he could sell the ball to fund the purchase of an arcade game stick.  We looked up the prices online and apparently memorabilia stores sell Ronnie Lott balls for $200 to $300.  The hubby was tempted to trade the ball for another prize at the party because some of our European coworkers didn’t really care about football and was able to trade for iPod nanos.  This was definitely one of the better company parties I have been to.

When we got home, my hubby called his parents since they are leaving the country tonight to do missionary work in the Philippines for an undetermined amount of time.  We have all been working towards this moment in the last few months with the purchase of their home and moving various things. Everyone was quite emotional, but there is also joy in that my in-laws will begin a new life for God.  It also made me feel very blessed to marry into such an awesome family full of love.

This morning we had a scheduled health exam for the life insurance I had applied for.  A slightly deaf nurse came to our home and took our blood and urine samples and took various biometrics.  I had written that we needed to buy life insurance a long time ago, but I never took the plunge.  I finally did it because we purchased my in-law’s home, and in case something happens either of our policies could pay off all the debts.  We bought a term policy and it is quite cheap because we’re both only 25 years old.

When I walked out the door  I saw one of my neighbors at the mailboxes.  She is  a 70 year old Chinese widow that talked to me a few times before because I am the only other Chinese person that lives in the complex. We said hello to each other and she said, “Going to work?”

I nodded.

“You’re lucky you still have a job! A lot of people are laid off!” She exclaimed.

“I know. I know I am lucky.”  I said as I walked out the door  to live another day.

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Happy new year everyone!  I have been away from my blogs for a while since I spent the last couple weeks in our new home down in Southern California.  My inlaws are moving to the Philippines in about 10 days and this may be the last Christmas we will spend with them in California.  This year we do  plan to go to the Philippines to visit them for Christmas.   The last two weeks was filled with a flurry activity.  We saw my sister in law get married in Temecula to her Navy seaman and then my parents made a drive down for a couple days.  We took them to the San Diego Zoo and also Hollywood Blvd.  My husband also had the chance to see quite a few friends and have dinner with them.

Christmas was lean last year because everyone is trying to save money.  The only shopping trip we went on was after Christmas at the local mall.   I lounged a bit in the Bath & Body Works since they were having a sale, but ultimately did not buy anything.  In the end, we went to  TJ Maxx with my parents since my mom is a big fan of that store, but I have never been in one.    TJ Maxx is kind of like Ross where brand name goods  are heavily discounted for consumers. I was surprised that they had a huge selection of beauty products including AHAVA brand moisturizers that my hubby got me from Israel one year.  My mother often buys the cosmetics there as gifts for friends in China because they are really into brands in China.   Anyway, this was the place I did the bulk of Christmas shopping.  I bought two large bottles of shampoo, a camera case for my dad, a shirt for my mom, and a pair of  PJs for myself.  Everything came under $45 since the store is so discounted.  You do have to dig a bit through the many multicolored shelves, but there are plenty of heavily discounted goods to be found.

For my inlaws we waived their rent payment on the house for these last few days and didn’t really buy anything new for them because they are  trying to get rid of everything in the house right now.  They actually gave us one of the presents we got them last year for Christmas because they can’t bring it to the Philippines.  Every single day we were doing some packing and sorting because a lot of things had to go.

On New Year’s day we drove a caravan back up here to Northern California with quite a bit of furniture and kitchen goods.  My inlaws also sold one of their cars to an aunt so they’re going home with less stuff.  It took us another half day to sort everything into our closets and storage spaces.   So basically we have been quite busy.

We also found a family that agreed to be caretakers for our house after my inlaws leave.  We reserved the right to use the downstairs guest room at anytime and they will be taking care of the gardening, pool, and utilities.  It is really an awesome deal for them, but we’re hoping it will not be long term.  The hubby is really contemplating moving down south, but we would need to secure employment there and that seems to be a lot tougher than getting jobs in the Silicon Valley.  Also, the hubby is waiting for his company’s games to be published this year so that he could say on his resume that he has shipped a couple games.  So basically we won’t be moving for at least one year.   Honestly speaking, if we both had jobs with comparable pay the quality of life is a lot higher there because the cost of living is quite a bit lower.   We could actually just live on one income if we moved into our house because it’s cheaper than renting a two bedroom apartment here.  The public elementary and middle schools there also have pretty high ratings so my hubby says that it’s more likely we’d move after we have kids.   As my friend Michael jokingly (or maybe seriously)  said once, “the Bay Area is where you work really hard for a crappier life”.

Even though this year  has just begun, I already have a list of things I’m planning to do.  First, I am seriously looking into a refinance even though we just bought the home a few months ago.  The reason is that interest rates have come down significantly in the last month because of the Fed’s plan to buy mortgage backed securities.  If you have significant equity in your home, good credit, and good income then it may be a good time to refinance, also.  I’m specifically looking into a no-cost refinance and right now I’m watching the rates at IndyMac and Technology Credit Union.  IndyMac quoted me a no-cost refinance rate of 4.75% a couple weeks ago but it was impossible for me to get all the paperwork through and their phonelines are always busy. They’ve also been sold to a bunch of private investors so I’m not sure the rates will ever get that low again.   Technology Credit Union is a local Silicon Valley credit union and they have a pretty straightforward online application so I’m watching the rates there.  They also answered phone calls pretty quickly when I called so I may do the no-cost refinance with them when the rate drops a little lower.  Their rate is currently at 5.25% for the no cost and lower than 5% with costs.  This credit union is for people who work or live in Santa Clara, San Mateo, Santa Cruz, San Francisco, Contra Costa, and Alameda, so pretty much most Bay Area folks can qualify for membership.

The next beast on my list is taxes for the year of 2008.  I may hire a professional this year to do it because I exercised some stock options last year and  bought the house with the hubby.  Seriously, I really hate taxes.

I think the rest of 2009 should be quite interesting since Barack Obama will be the new president.  Will the United States be revitalized or go down the tubes?  No one knows yet, but we will be okay as long as we trust God and be responsible with our own actions.  This is a year that will be filled with challenges for everyone around the world, and hopefully these events make us stronger and more prudent in the years to come.

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