Five weeks until our lives change forever

Today is officially the first day of my 36th week of pregnancy.  Last Tuesday I had another ultrasound to check my baby’s position and size.  According to the ultrasound machine he is 4lbs and 13 ozes plus or minus 12 ozes at 34 weeks and 3 days, and that is an average size for 34 weeks of gestation.  In the next 5 weeks he is supposed to gain 1/2 lb per week on average so hopefully he will be between 6 to 8lbs when he finally comes out.  His head is already down and his feet are jabbing me in the ribs constantly.  I have been keeping my blood sugar in check and it seems that everything is fine.  It seems that this weekend a 19lb baby was born to a diabetic Asian woman in Indonesia, and several people have told me that it’s a good thing that I have kept my blood sugar in check because that baby’s size is due to the extra glucose in the mother’s blood.  I am pretty sure now that my kid will not gain more than 3lbs per week in the next five weeks.

Anyway, the hubby and I took several classes on preparing for childbirth and breastfeeding in the last few weeks at Kaiser.  I think the classes really helped in letting us know what to expect at Kaiser and I was pretty reassured because they do  promote a normal vaginal birth if it is possible. It was also good to know when to go to the hospital and what trouble signs to look for and the classes involved the dads quite a bit.   We have asked our parents how they dealt with our births since we were both the oldest child for them, and to be honest they weren’t super helpful because we were both born in Asian countries decades ago and the procedures were pretty different.  My mom just told me that it hurt a lot and she doesn’t remember much of it, and my dad said that he pedaled my mom to the hospital on a bike with a wagon.   Apparently dads weren’t even allowed in the delivery room and he just remembers that he went home and boiled 8 eggs and brought them to my mom at the hospital after I was born.   My parents also had extremely conflicting advice on what and how much to eat during the pregnancy so I am glad that there was more reliable health education at Kaiser.  In general it seems that people love to give pregnant women advice, and a lot of the times it can be confusing and conflicting.

I am definitely getting more excited about the arrival of the baby now, but I also realize that our lives will change pretty drastically.  In the breastfeeding class we were taught that the baby needs to be fed 8 to 12 times a day in the beginning because their stomachs are puny.  That is definitely more work than I would have expected, but we will deal with it.  The important thing is that we will have to work as a team.  As to finances, I have been asked a few times by acquaintances  if I will be a stay at home mom now that I have a kid.  To be fair, most of these people do not know that I have a fairly well paying job.  The fact of the matter is that we would have to live paycheck to paycheck if we were to live just on the hubby’s income right now, and even though many families do this I don’t feel like I would be comfortable living in that situation because that will definitely create more stress in our family.  I make enough to justify paying for childcare after my leave is finished and our families may also be able to help out from time to time.  Another thing is that we both want to retire early so it makes sense for me to keep my career and earn as much as possible right now.   Some people may think that this is selfish, but I think our marriage is a bit more stable than some others’ just because we are both financially capable  and we have never argued about something like not being able to pay a bill.   I think a financially secure family environment is usually better for a child because a little  kid shouldn’t have to share in the money problems of his parents.    On the other hand,  we will also make sure we don’t spoil our kid with stuff.  We are hoping to perhaps have one of us work from home in a few years and move out of the Bay Area, but that is a long term plan.   We have always wanted a kid, so we will make it work somehow.  Our parents managed to raise us with very little means and send us to college so we should be able to do it too.

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