We live in a capitalist society that glorifies the rich. The mainstream media publishes lists of what the wealthy buy, where they live, and what they are worth. The constant attention to the affluent makes us want to have more and more. For many Americans, their net worths have become their ultimate value in life and they’re constantly comparing their wealth to that of neighbors, friends, and complete strangers. I think it’s incredibly unhealthy and dangerous to keep score in life with money for the following reasons:
1. One can become complacent when comparing with those who have less — If I compared what I have with what others in my peer group have I am very likely to fall into complacency. For example, according to CNN’s networth comparison calculator, people my age have a median networth of $400. If I ran with that statistic then I could spend pretty much all my money and still remain above average. Many of us have also read Casey Serin’s now deceased blog and thought to ourselves, “at least I didn’t get into THAT much debt.” Comparing ourselves with people worse off than us does make us feel better about our own situation, but our misguided comfort may also make us a little less prudent in how we spend and invest money.
2. One can become depressed when comparing with those who have more –I live in the middle of a place where multi-millionaires don’t even feel rich. It is a rather ridiculous and comical situation when you think about it. In the article one millionaire stated, “everyone around here looks at the people above them”. Well, guess what? If they just stopped comparing their networth to that of the billionaire in the next town, then maybe they wouldn’t feel so poor. It’s almost impossible to become the richest person in the world so if you look up you’ll always find someone above you. Even when you are the richest person in the world, you may find yourself worrying that you’d lose the number one spot if you’ve always been worried about what others have. Basically, if you keep on wanting more you’ll never have enough.
3. One may be envying only an illusion of wealth — When I walk through the parking lot at work I see quite a few very expensive cars. I don’t really know which ones are paid for and which ones are leased. What I do know is that if I wanted one of those cars I would have to shell out a significant amount of my savings. It’s very likely that those who lease very expensive cars don’t have more money than I do. However, many people get caught up in appearances and run out to buy that Mercedes or BMW just so that they fit into their parking lots even if they can’t afford it. There is really no point in envying someone’s large pile of debt. However, when we look at our neighbors we probably don’t see credit card bills and negative savings. We see their plasma screens and McMansions, and those physical things certainly could stir up jealousy.
4. One may lose meaningful relationships — Sometimes people lose track of their families, friends, and even themselves in pursuit of money. This could happen if a person works way too much and doesn’t have any time to enjoy their money. Also, sometimes people may alienate their friends and family because of their financial situation. I have seen people isolate themselves because they thought they are too poor, and thus they feel like failures. On the other end of the spectrum I have met people who feel like they’re too rich to speak to you. A person’s wealth shouldn’t prevent him or her from making meaningful relationships. I still believe that if a person is really my friend they wouldn’t care how much money I have.
I believe the key to defeating these potential pitfalls is to forget about what other people have, ignore statistics, and only compete with yourself to improve your life I do not care about how many houses other people bought or how much money they have. That’s their business and not mine. I only keep tabs on how much I have because I know fully what is going on in my life. In competing with myself I try to do better than I did in yesteryears. For example, I set gradually larger financial goals for myself and try to reach them. To reach these goals in a timely fashion I would need to increase my income, and to do that I try to improve my career and investing skills. I accomplish things when I compete with myself because I know where I am and where I want to go. Ultimately, making an inventory of other people’s knick knacks will not improve your life.
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5 comments ↓
This is a well written article. We should know what’s enough is enough in our life. Besides money, we have much more other stuffs we should pursure such as friendship.
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