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That might be true to some but I think it might be underestimating how much some of us SAHMs weigh our choices. In my case it wasn’t about what was best for my child when I made the decision but how having a parent at home in our situation would benefit our children in the long term.
Notice I said, “in our situation.” I acknowledge that it’s very different for many other women.
We were a low income family but my salary, as small as it was despite working almost full-time, was eaten up in expenses related to work. Aside from money other considerations were a chaotic schedule for my daughter (when you’re low income there’s a greater chance you’re working awful and unstable shifts) and no one on the homefront looking after cleaning, meals, budgets, etc.
Add to that the decision we made to homeschool our kids and being a SAHM became my role.
I would definitely agree with the idea that in can be intelecctually deadly. However, that is within a mom’s control. It took me awhile to figure that out though. Now however I take a history/religion/philosophy course, sing in a choir, research interests on the internet…Lots of stuff to keep boredom at bay. And my kids are getting older and more interesting. Surprisingly I’ve also found that in the role of homemaker I’ve become more confident, free and have a firmer sense of myself then I ever had before.
One thing I’ve wondered though, how much the way modern families are often isolated from relatives can play into the stresses of both working outside the home or being a housewife. I’ve probably had an easier go in part because I have a lot of family around me and so a lot of support.
Regardless, good discussion. I hate the ”Mommy war” label myself and would much rather figure out how we could help each other in the roles we choose.]]>